Love Galore

August 13, 2023

6:34pm

Love is a weird concept and one that we as humans couldn’t escape if we tried. Most of us have probably had a picture of what love is supposed to look like ingrained in our heads since before we could remember. Maybe your version of love is grounded in your parents' relationship, or maybe you’re like me and based it off a 1997, James Cameron film. Either way, most of us have been taught that the way we should receive love looks a certain way. It’s supposed to be a Disney fairytale, usually ending in a happily ever after. Well, guess what– they’re lying. The idea of a storybook ending being the only way to receive love seems… heteronormative?

Though my first examples of love stemmed from my parents and various rom-coms, the majority of my firsthand experience comes from my previous relationship. To preface, we were only 15 years old when we started dating—young and naive. I tried to make it work for a long time, probably too long, but at some point, I had to be honest with myself. We just couldn’t give each other what the other needed, and that’s okay. Because I wanted that happily ever after so badly, I failed to realize that I could receive the love I really need from my friends, family, and even myself.

A romantic relationship isn’t the only way to receive love. In fact, it is just one of many. The key here is determining your needs, so you can recognize them aside from romantic relationships.

Think about what you need in order to feel loved. For me, I need to feel respected. I need to feel like my thoughts and feelings are validated. I don’t need everyone to agree with me, but I do need to feel heard. And, I need to feel loved unconditionally. As Nick Viall says, those are my non-negotiables.

For instance, let’s talk about my relationship with Caroline. She’s my partner in all of this which means we constantly work together when creating content. Because we write about such personal topics, I feel like it gets tricky when we have to give each other feedback. Throughout the creative process of building The Rapport Room, Caroline and I have had differing opinions. We’re two different people, it’s only natural. However, not one time have I ever thought that she was disrespectful about her opinions, nor have I felt like she didn’t validate mine. With that, I know that who I am as a person is enough for us to maintain our friendship. Though we are partners in this, I know that just because I miss one upload day, the friendship won’t crumble. It’s unconditional.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that there are people out there that want to give you the love you ask for, and deserve. We get pushed towards happily ever after when sometimes that love is waiting for us in the form of a friend, a family member, or even yourself. What do you need in order to feel loved, and who do you have in your life already that is willing to give you those things? Think about it, and comment down below :)